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A UK Pregnancy, Parenting and Lifestyle Blog
November 29, 2016

What makes a perfect play date*

Sometimes it can feel like our children have better social lives than we do ourselves! Between the birthday parties, the trips to the park, the toddler groups and, of course, the good old classic play dates round a friend’s house, our kids’ social calendars fill up fast. We were asked by the lovely people at Aptamil Growing Up milks to host our very own play date and to have a watch of how our little toddlers play for their Science of Play campaign. This advertorial is brought to you in association with Aptamil Growing Up milks.

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Aptamil Growing Up milks have created a series of observational videos on the ‘Science of Play’, which look at all of the amazing skills that toddlers are learning every time they play – even though we might not realise it – and which explore the fascinating changes that are taking place in toddlerhood.

I have to say, play dates at a friend’s house, or hosting one at our own house, is probably my favourite activity to do with my toddler. You see, she’s at the age where she causes absolute carnage when we are out and about so anywhere I can take her where she can roam free a little bit more, is a winner for me. Play is such an important aspect of a toddler’s learning, which reinforces the fact that play dates are a great activity to engage in. They are also great for parents as it gives them an opportunity to have social interaction with other parents and learn from each other.

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With that in mind, I thought it would be fun to round up what makes a perfect play date in our eyes! Let’s start with what the toddlers might think is the number one factor that makes a perfect play date. Lots of fun and interesting toys to free play with.

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We have accumulated quite a range of toys in the 2.5 years Little I has been on this planet, and I’m sure it’s the same for any parent. I’ve noticed that it’s good to have a wide range of toys left out because some toddlers are less likely to go rummaging around in someone else’s toy box, and you want them to feel as comfortable as possible in their new environment. Especially if they’re a bit younger. Little I has always been an independent little thing and has gone off to play by herself quite happily, but between 15 and 20 months toddlers are just starting to play independently from their parents. And usually for about 15 minutes at a time. So it’s definitely important to make them feel happy and safe.

The next thing that makes a play date that little bit more fun and engaging for the toddlers is music.

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Who doesn’t love a little dance around to a fun, upbeat tune? You can just pop on a good, child friendly playlist and see what the toddlers make of it. It was so much fun to watch them react to the music and start moving around. My daughter loves to dance so doesn’t need any excuse to lead her friends round the room waving her arms about. It was also really interesting to see the difference in reaction to the music from Little I, who is 30 months old and her friends, who are a little bit younger, at 23 months and 21 months old. Little I was trying to sing along and do certain actions the music, the younger ones were happy just to bop about. I didn’t realise that toddlers start to use pitch from around 24 months onwards.

https://youtu.be/jjwJDsyM0eY

Advertorial video from Aptamil Follow On and Growing Up milks.

I think the next element boils down to who you are with for your play date. It’s all about behaviour.

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Of course you can’t particularly control how your toddler feels on a certain day, but you can guide their behaviour towards what you believe is socially acceptable. The main example I can think of is encouraging your little one to share with their friends. This is a tricky concept for toddlers though. They are typically quite egocentric little creatures, which means they don’t see how their behaviour affects others. Little I is now 30 months old and so is starting to show some signs of being able to share a bit better. She likes to hand things to other children and go ‘there ooo go’ (there you go) at the top of her voice!

The last aspect of the perfect play date, in our opinion, is all about the activities and having enough of them up your sleeve to distract the kids away from any tantrums or fall outs over toys!

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Having lots of books to hand is always a great idea. Toddlers love books and they are great for their learning. They really help with getting them talking too. I had no idea toddlers can understand 150-200 words when they are between 1.5 – 2 years old. They then have a vocabulary of 150 words at the age of 2. And by the time they are 3 that’s doubles to 300 words. Crazy! I’ll look forward to that!

We’re also big fans of stickers and crafting as activities to keep your play date fun and interesting. There is one last thing that makes a perfect play date…a good cup of tea or coffee (and maybe a biscuit or two) for the parents!

To find out more about the ‘Science of Play’, and how toddlers learn through play, visit the Aptamil Growing Up milk’s ‘Discover Toddlers’ section of the Huffington Post. Here you will be able to see all of the Science of Play videos and additional information about toddlerhood.

What makes the perfect play date in your eyes? Do you like hosting play dates?

 

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Kisses and cuddles with my faves 💖💫 Kisses and cuddles with my faves 💖💫
‘Each of us as citizens, has a role to play in c ‘Each of us as citizens, has a role to play in creating a better world for our children.’ - Nelson Mandela ❤️
It’s not enough though, is it? We’ve always h It’s not enough though, is it?

We’ve always had diverse toys in our house (not enough, but I’m working on it ❤️), but when questioned ‘why do you buy your kids Black dolls?’, I’ve faltered and answered incorrectly. I would respond saying ‘because that’s the doll Isla liked the best. What does it matter? We’re all human’, rather than questioning why that person is questioning it in the first place.

In a massive learning curve this week, where I am actively trying to become an anti-racist ally, not just anti-racist/non racist in general, I have found so many shortcomings in my effort to educate my kids and in my own attitudes towards race. But this isn’t about me. So here are some resources I’d like to share on top of the ones shared in my stories.

Some books to read:
Me and White Supremacy - Layla F. Saad.
Why I’m No Longer Talking To White People About Race - Reni Eddo-Lodge.
How to argue with a racist - Adam Rutherford.
Brit(ish) - Afua Hirsch.
White Fragility - Robin Diangelo.
I Am Not Your Baby Mother - Candice Brathwaite.
So You Want to Talk About Race - Ijeoma Oluo.

Diverse kids books:
Anti Racist Baby - X. Kendi.
Riley Can Be Anything -Davina Hamilton.
Look Up - Nathan Bryon.
Mae Among The Stars - Roda Ahmed.
The Mega Magic Hair Swap - Rochelle Humes.
Let’s Talk About Race - Julius Lester.
Welcome To Our World - Moira Butterfield and Harriet Lynas.
This Book Is Antiracist - Tiffany Jewell.
The Extraordinary Gardener - Sam Boughton.
Let The Children March - Monica Clark-Robinson.
Ruby’s Worry - Tom Percival.
A Kids Book About Racism - Jelani Memory.

Some things to watch:
When They See Us.
13th.
Who Killed Malcom X.
Time: The Kalief Browder Story.
Explained: The Racial Wealth Gap.
Dear White People.
I am Not Your Negro.

My to do list:
- Sign more petitions.
- Donate to more causes.
- Listen to podcasts and share.
- Encourage changes in the school curriculum so that my children, and their classmates, get a better, much more rounded and diverse education.
- Call things out.
- Have honest/open conversations.
- Share content.
- To keep educating myself, whilst never expecting others to do it for me.

It’s just a starting point.

Thanks for listening x
Black Lives Matter. I can never pretend to unders Black Lives Matter.

I can never pretend to understand, but I will always stand.

I’ve been on a huge learning curve this week and have, shamefully, come to the realisation, which I should have a long time ago, that it’s not enough to just not be racist. We must also be actively anti-racist and do everything in our power to ensure our children are too.

Today is a day to stop, listen, support, educate ourselves, donate, sign petitions, take action in any way we can, big and small, to make sure that everyone knows we stand with our fellow humans, family and friends. But we can’t just do this today. We must do it each and every day going forward ✊🏿✊🏾✊🏽✊🏼✊🏻
And breathe! First day without both my babies for And breathe! First day without both my babies for the first time in 10 weeks today and it couldn’t have gone better. Both had wonderful days and were full of stories when they got home. I said over on stories last night, which got an incredible response so thank you to everyone who reached out, that I am completely comfortable with my choice to send the kids back to school and nursery but would never, ever judge anyone who felt different. We are all in different boats in this storm we’ve found ourselves in and what works for my family, might not work for yours. I have deliberately stayed out of the ‘are you sending your kids back or not?’ debate as it started to feel like another toxic discussion, in the media and on social media, that was resulting in yet another parenting divide.
I could have had the kids in this whole time, under key worker provision, but tried my best to hang on till the phased reopenings that I hoped would happen when they did. They were what I was aiming towards. Don’t get me wrong, I have LOVED having the kids at home together for such a sustained period, we have made lots of memories and learnt so much more about each other, but mixed in with the nature of my job and the fact that @thisdadalife is deployed and so I’m on my own with minimal support, I couldn’t have gone on much longer.
When I got in from dropping them off today, and as I went upstairs to work at my desk, I literally collapsed on the stairs and almost cried in relief. Relief that we made it through, as dramatic as that sounds. I don’t think I realised the toll it was taking mentally as I was constantly running on adrenaline.
I am so happy to get a bit more balance back and to, most importantly, feel like a better mum again. Not a snappy trying to juggle it all 24/7 with no break mum.
If you sent your kids back today, whether you wanted to or not, I’m with you and support you.
If you have kept them home in your bubble for longer, I’m with you and support you.
If you’re still unsure what to do and are undecided, I am with you and support you.
Nobody knows the full extent of someone else’s circumstances and we have to stop and realise that before we judge anyone else ❤️
Ibiza vibes in Puerto Gardeno today 😂☀️😅 Ibiza vibes in Puerto Gardeno today 😂☀️😅
This is the first year in YEARS that I have felt ok wearing a bikini. And I feel like it’s more down to how strong I feel, rather than how I look. Whatever it is, I hope it continues ❤️
On another note, how tanned does the @filterbymollymae fake tan make you look! 🙌🏻
(Both bikini and cover up are from last year).
#losingmyboobstho #youwinsomeyoulosesomehaha
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